The Pumpkin Pie Panic

This year has been an odd cruising year. We had hoped to make it to Stuart, FL by Thanksgiving to have our dinner with friends, but the combination of hurricane Joaquin and the passing of my husband's father set our travels back by six weeks. We did manage a good dinner at Bucksport Marina on the ICW, but it was not one I labored over with love in my galley.

This weekend a friend of ours came to visit who had also not had a good Thanksgiving dinner, and it seemed like an appropriate time to spend the day cooking. I prepared my favorite pumpkin pie, opened the Hillerange oven door to put it in, only to discover that the mercury switch in the oven wall was in flames. I quickly turned off the oven, flipped the propane solenoid and turned off the propane at the tank. After a few minutes of discussion with my resident boat mechanic, it was determined that the mercury switch was defective and that we were, once again, without an oven. Most of the rest of the dinner could be prepared on the stove top, but the ready-to-bake pie sat there, taunting. After having learned to make pizza on the stove top last summer, I began to wonder if the pie could be baked on the stove top as well. I began to construct a stove top oven of sorts, by placing my heat diffuser on the burner. Next I placed a foil strip around the edge of the pie crust and lowered the pie pan into my cast iron skillet which I placed on the diffuser. I inverted my 10-1/2 inch heavy stainless steel deep skillet on top of the pie pan and baked the pie for about an hour on a medium low flame.

I anticipated that if it worked at all, the crust would most surely be damp and gummy. Much to my surprise, the crust was golden brown, and the pie perfectly set. The keys for the success seem to be in setting the pan on the crumpled foil around the crust which allowed the steam to escape, and in not raising the lid at all during the baking time. Our pumpkin pie panic turned into a very nice sharing of pie with neighbors over some good coffee and conversation. Score!

Fold a long piece of aluminum foil in quarters length wise and place this strip around the pie, crimping the ends together

Place a diffuser on the burner, place a cast iron skillet on the diffuser, place the prepared pie plate in the skillet (lip of pie plate should rest on edge of skillet but the bottom of the pie plate should not touch the bottom of the skillet.) Invert deep, straight-sided skillet on top of pie, resting edge of skillet on crimped foil.







Place some hot mitts (sorry mine are well-used and not pretty) on top to help hold the heat. It also helps if your top pan is a good heavy-bottomed pan.










Bake for about one hour on a medium-low flame. Do not lift lid to check. Smell periodically to check for burning - your burner temp may need to be adjusted either up or down.

 The crust browned nicely, which I think was a result of the crust being right against the top pan.

It passed the taste test!!

Beer Box

Ed note: updated 3-23-18. See note.

After posting the Beer Tubes post, a couple readers asked if I had attempted something similar for bottles, so here we go.

The bottle box was a much more complicated affair. First of all, what size do you make it, because there are so many beer bottles out there in different sizes? I modeled our box to fit a Killian's Irish Red which is the same height as a Yuengling. If your favorite beer is shorter or fatter, you may need to use a different size dryer duct. Second of all, bottles are too tall to efficiently store them upright so the only conclusion was to lay them on their sides and roll them up. Good in theory, tougher in practice.

I used the same 4" dryer duct tubes to form the box. It requires three of them, and they need to be laid flat out and the corrugated end cut off. One piece will form the front of the box, the width of the panel is almost exactly the length of a long-neck beer bottle, and the other two will be bent to form the sides and back. Here's the specific directions. (I apologize in advance for some of the blurry pics. The macro setting on my camera seems to have gone on the fritz).

Flatten out the first tube. Measure the depth of your fridge that you want the box to be. Cut on that line. Cut all three panels in the same way.










Choose the panel that will be the front of your box. Slide one of the other two panels into the locking grooves.

 Bend that panel at right angles using first your hands and then a ball peen hammer to sharpen up the corner. Remove that panel and repeat with the other side panel.

Mark each panel because you will be taking them off and putting them back on during the test fit process.

At this point yo should have something that looks like this.

Measure for the next fold. This measurement will be the diameter of your beer bottle plus a smidge. You need to allow room for the straps to move as well as the bottle to roll without hinderance.

Use a table edge or a yardstick to form the next bend, using hands first for the rough bend and then the hammer again for the crisp edge.

This should be what you have next.

This is a closeup of what the corner should look like where you slide the two pieces together.

At this point you should have something like this.

 Tape the loose edges together with painter's tape, just to temporarily hold them together. Measure the width and match it exactly to the width of the front piece so the box is square.

At this point you should be able to see the two locking channels available to you. Well, at least hopefully you can see better than this blurry pic. The channel you will use to join the back is the one on the top in this picture.

This is the correct channel to use. the panel to the left in this picture will be cut so that it fits into the groove on the panel to the right of the picture. Mark the left hand panel with a Sharpie and cut it. Be sure to cut carefully and in a perfectly straight line so that it fits into the groove on the right panel.

 Slide the one back panel into the locking channel on the other back panel and tape it with Gorilla Tape. As with the Beer Tubes, don't skimp on this. Regular duct tape will succumb to the moisture always present in boat fridges.

Tape all of the joints at the locking channels with Gorilla Tape.

Cut two pieces of ribbon or webbing that are at least 1" wide, and 2-1/2 times the length of the box. Lay them as pictured and run a length of Gorilla Tape over them from side to side.

 Run the webbing down into the box, across the bottom and back up the other side. Use one of your patiently waiting beer bottles to hold the webbing down.

Cut a piece of dowel rod the width of the box. Cut the webbing so that it is long enough to go around the rod and have an inch and a half to tape to itself.

I found the box was not stiff enough so I had to add a piece of 1/4x1-1/2 trim to the front edge to stiffen it up. I just taped it on and taped around the edge.

Lay your  bottles in like this. I alternated mine facing every other direction and they seem to roll a bit better.

 

Here's the video demonstration. It's completely functional, but not near as elegant as the Beer Tubes. But hey, at least you can get a beer without removing everything else from the fridge. The energy savings alone should pay for a six pack before long. Enjoy!

Note: I have since changed the design a little. I removed the straps and added a piece of Phifertex. I taped it along the top edge, made it long enough to go to the bottom and back up the other side and rolled out around a piece of wooden dowel to use as a handle. The bottles tended to fall out of the straps and the Phifertex makes a nice cradle for them to sit in.

Beer Tubes

(Ed note: updated 8-8-16 - see end note)

One of the most frustrating things about living on a boat (especially for my husband) is dealing with a top-loading refrigerator. Every once in awhile you'll even see the cartoons about someone falling in while trying to reach something on the bottom.

For my husband, the big frustration was in getting a can of Coke or beer out. They always seem to migrate to the bottom of the fridge and getting one involved removing almost everything. We tried various racks designed for regular upright fridges but they just didn't work. After seeing that a good friend of ours had the same issue with his fridge,  I decided to create a solution.

I once had a friend that stored his grill propane tanks in a piece of PVC pipe attached to his bimini rail. It had a slot in the side so he could push the tanks up and out the top as he needed them. I thought something similar might work in the fridge, only the slot idea wasn't going to fly because the fridge is usually packed and it would be impossible to access it. I then began to think about using a ribbon or piece of webbing to lift out the cans. Several trips to the hardware stores changed the plan as the smallest diameter PVC tube is 3" and it's just a bit too big for the cans and takes unnecessary space in the fridge. The wall thickness was too big also, which would mean longer cooling times for the cans.

I spent an hour just walking around Lowes looking at stuff and happened on the aluminum dryer duct pieces - the ones that come in a flat sheet and you curve them into a tube and lock the edges together (not the flexible hoses). The smallest one they had was 4" diameter, but I figured I could cut it down and it would work fine.  I did, and it did. So here's the directions:

Materials required
1 piece of 4" dryer aluminum dryer duct extension for each tube. Mine was a 2' section
1 piece of heavy grosgrain ribbon or webbing that is 2-1/2 times the length of your finished tube
Gorilla tape - don't skimp on this.
Good pair of tin snips

If you're using the 4" duct extension, examine the locking mechanism so you cut off the right edge. You need the slot edge to remain because once you cut off the other side, you will insert the cut edge in to the slot before you tape it so that fingers and the cans won't get cut on the sharp edge.

Once you determine which edge to cut, mark 3-3/4" from the edge in several places with a permanent marker and draw a line to cut. This aluminum is very sharp so watch your fingers. Cut very carefully because you need a perfectly straight edge to insert into the slot.

Carefully wrap the sheet into a cylinder shape and working from one end to the other, insert the cut edge into the slot on the other edge. It takes some wiggling to get it to go in the whole length.

Cut a piece of Gorilla tape the length of the tube and place it evenly over the seam.

Cut the tube to the length that will fit in your fridge, allowing about 1/2 of space between the top of the tube and the underside of your fridge lid.
File or sand the top and bottom edges of the tube to remove any burrs.

Lay your ribbon or webbing about 2" from the top of the tube and tape all the way around the tube top, fastening the webbing under the tape.

Run the webbing over the edge, down in to the tube and up over the opposite edge making a dip in the webbing. Place a beverage can on the webbing and continue to lower the can into the tube, adding more cans as you go.

Here's the video of the final product in action:

Some miscellaneous notes:


I fastened my tubes to a wood divider that we have in our fridge so they wouldn't topple over if the fridge was not full. I did that with another piece of webbing that I screwed into the wood, around the tubes, and back into the wood.

Also, I did notice through trial and error, that it appears you can't fasten the webbing onto the tube directly over the seam. For some reason it changes the shape of the tube when you pull and makes the cans stick. Fasten the webbing 1/4 way around from the seam.

We have styrofoam board on the bottom of our fridge on top of a teak grate for insulation, and I actually "screwed" the tube into the foam a bit to hold it in place.

If you have any other ideas for modification or improvement, leave them in the comments!

Update 8-8-2016

After using these now for over a year, a few issues have come to light. Were I to make new ones, I would make them just slightly larger. As the tubes wear, the top edges bend a bit making it harder to slide the cans out, making the webbing strap push off to one side or the other. I might also consider using the PVC the next time. All in all, these tubes have been a lifesaver on our boat!

In search of the perfect cheeseburger

Note: Edited to add a couple things I forgot.

The perfect cheeseburger has always eluded me. This is particularly frustrating because cheeseburgers happen to be one of my husband's favorite foods. I've tried the grill thing, both charcoal and gas, and always seemed to end up with burned on the outside and dry, dry, dry on the inside. Tried cooking them less, and ended up with red on the inside, which is a no-no for me. Just can't do the rare thing. After years of trying, I had pretty much given up and left the cheeseburger eating to those rare nights when we ate out.

Fast forward to our cruising days. That would be our budget cruising days, the ones that include even much rarer eating out, and cheeseburgers were being missed. One day I spent a few hours on the settee determinedly perusing the internet in search of the perfect cheeseburger recipe that would yield the heretofore unrealized juicy, fragrant, flavorful culinary delight of beef, cheese, and bun. After reading a dozen sets of instructions, I pooled the  most sensible of the ideas, got out my meat and gave it a try. To say that my husband was pleased would be an understatement. It was, in fact, something akin to an orgasm, I believe. So perfect were the results, that we now have cheeseburgers almost once a week. So it is with great fanfare that I present to you, The Perfect Cheeseburger.

Before you even start, know that this recipe takes time. Do not rush it, because if you do, you will not get the results you are looking for. Here are the steps.

1. Start with ground chuck in the 80/20 meat to fat ratio. If you use lean ground beef you will not end up with a juicy hamburger. Don't compromise on this step.

2. Break the meat up into chunks with two forks. You can do this right in the store foam tray.

3. Season the beef very well. I use salt, pepper, garlic salt, and just a touch of barbecue seasoning. Do not be shy about the seasoning, especially the salt. You will find you need more than you usually think you do. Just sprinkle the seasoning on the top of the chunks but do not stir it in.

4. Walk away. Far away. L et the meat stand 30-45 minutes or longer with the seasoning on it and don't touch it, no matter how tempted you are.

5. Preheat your skillet over medium high heat while you form the patties. Don't grill them. Use a skillet. Juicy, flavorful hamburgers depend on frying in their own fat to absorb the moisture and flavor. If you're on a diet, skip this post.

6. Gently form the meat into patties being careful not to overwork it. It should just barely be held together. Poke five or six holes in the patty with your finger, then place in the preheated skillet. Put the patty where you want it because you cannot move it once you set it in the pan.


7. Reduce the heat to medium low and allow the patties to cook until the edges begin to turn brown but the top is still pink.

8. Turn the patties over gently. Reduce the heat to low and cover the pan. Let the patties cook for a few minutes until the juice running out is clear.

9. Slap some cheese on those babies, cover the pan, and then turn the heat off. Continue preparing your side dishes while the burgers sit.

10. By the time your side dishes are done, the burgers will be too. If your cheese is very soft you may want to wait to put it on the burgers until the last minute.


Experiment with seasonings and your stove temperature. It may take a few tries to get it exactly the way you like it, but believe me when I say it is worth the effort!

Versatile Flour Tortillas

We eat a lot of Mexican on the boat. It's tasty, it's easy, and the ingredients are easy to store. A good many of our recipes use flour tortillas. If you've never made them yourself, you may not want to - they are so good that you will have a very difficult time going back to store bought after that, so be prepared to make a lot of tortillas! Just remember that these tortillas don't have the preservatives in them that the store bought ones do that make them last an unnaturally long time without molding. Make small enough batches that you can use them in a day or two, or store them in the fridge for about a week max. A note on ingredients: I have not tried these with whole wheat flour yet, but if you do you will need to cut it about 1/2 and 1/2 with white flour and you may need substantially more liquid. You can also cook some spinach and use the drained, pressed-out water for the water in these. Use your imagination. On the shortening, lard or butter - I personally abhor shortening. The Mexicans use lard exclusively for their tortillas and I find it makes a better one.

 
Ingredients:

2-1/2 cups of white flour
1 Tbl shortening or lard or butter.
1 tsp. of baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
3/4-1 cup boiling water


Directions:

Mix the flour, baking powder and salt together. Cut in the shortening until it resembles very fine cornmeal.

Add 1/2 cup of the boiling water and then begin to mix it with a fork. Add the remaining water a very little at a time and continue mixing until the dough pulls away from the sides of the pan. You may not need all the water. The dough should be soft but not sticky at all.

Knead the dough on a lightly floured surface until it's smooth and elastic, usually just a few minutes.

Oil the surface of the dough and put it back in the bowl and let it rest, covered, for 10 minutes.

Break off golf ball sized hunks of dough and roll them into balls. Keep the balls covered while you work the tortillas so the dough doesn't dry out.  Roll a ball out with a rolling pin until it's very thin but you can still handle it without tearing it.

Preheat a cast iron skillet to medium high and lower the tortilla into the pan carefully so you don't fold it over on itself. Cook it until bubbles start to form.

Flip it and continue to cook it until it has brown spots on the bottom. Move the tortillas to a plate and cover with another plate. The moisture from the warm tortilla will help to soften it. Continue to stack the warm tortillas, but rearrange them periodically so they become evenly moist and soft. If you are making tacos, you can begin to fry the tortillas in oil right away . Use tongs to hold the taco shape as you fry them.Serve warm or cool completely and store in a plastic bag with a paper towel inside the bag to absorb excess moisture.

Beer Cheese Dip

A friend of ours recently brought this dip to sundowners in our cockpit. It's incredibly easy, tastes great, and the ingredients are easy to store on a boat. Besides, it has the side benefit of not using an entire bottle of beer so you <ahem> have to drink the rest. Thanks Tricia for an excellent recipe!


Ingredients:

8 oz of cream cheese (whipped or regular either one works great)
1/2 package of Hidden Valley Ranch dressing mix powder
Cheddar cheese grated
Beer

Directions:

Beat the cream cheese in a small bowl until creamy. You can do this by hand if you don't have a mixer and it will work just as well. Add the Hidden Valley Ranch dressing mix and stir it in well. Add as much cheddar as you want. The more cheddar, the cheesier the taste. I used a very sharp cheddar which seems to balance the beer flavor well.  Add a little beer at a time, stirring well in between. Add enough beer to make a light, spreadable consistency. You can vary the flavor of this dip a tremendous amount by what beer you choose. I used Blue Moon for this sample and the taste is pretty light. If you use a darker beer it will make the taste much richer. Choose what you like. Serve it with crackers, fritos, pretzels or veggies.